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My personal experience.

20 May '24
3 min read


I am sure we all know the proverb, "All that glitters is not gold." A person's physical appearance should not be the criteria for judging his character. This rule applies to nonliving entities as well. I realized this when my husband bought six red juicy apples for us to eat. When I cut two of them into slices, I found them infested with worms, and the interior of the fruits had started rotting.  It's evident from this incident and other similar cases that some unscrupulous people would stoop very low to pass off rotten content merely by polishing their exterior surface. 

I must share a real-life incident that truly shook me and my family to the core. It was in 2018 when my brother set up his profile on a matrimonial website( I do not wish to reveal the name for safety reasons) where he thought he found a perfect match. Initially, he faced objections from the prospective bride's family. Somehow he managed to convince them with his relentless pursuit. They got married in the year 2019 at Sahibganj, Jharkhand. They renewed their marriage vows at Nagpur for the sake of our relatives. However, our joy was short-lived as my brother's wife started revealing her true colors. Her brother also came to live with us until she got adjusted to her marital home.

She started throwing tantrums, treating my mother like a slave, and instigating my brother to argue with my mom. I felt quite disgusted with him for not admonishing his wife. Instead, he had heated arguments with my mother and made her shed tears. She didn't deserve this kind of third-degree treatment. My mom would cook food for her and promptly offer her a hot cup of coffee. She treated her like a princess and yet, my sister-in-law would lash out at her. I scolded my brother for his attitude. I could understand why he was supporting his wife. They were newly married and thought he would win her over with his generosity and love. The woman was getting nastier, day by day. When she went to live with my brother in Muscat, she started torturing him to an extreme level. She would never allow him to send money to my mother and turned into a hardcore dictator. Her lavish spending on luxury items left my brother under a heavy burden of debt. 

Unable to bear her verbal and mental abuse, my brother filed for a divorce from her in 2020 and the case is still going on. She was a gold digger and thought that since my brother lived abroad, he would be rich and fulfill all her demands. He realized his mistake. He had married her for her good looks which was the result of excessive makeup.  

Fortunate are those who find their perfect soulmates. However, it's quite disheartening to note that marriages these days come up with an expiry date. A chuckle escapes from my lips when I imagine humans as commodities advertised on matrimonial websites with no guarantee and coming with a price tag , that is, a list of unrealistic expectations at the cost of losing our freedom.

So, before you think of tying the nuptial knot, it is advisable to find out more about the prospective groom or bride, their likes & dislikes, their strengths and weaknesses, and whether they are compatible with each other.  Marriage is an investment involving huge psychological, financial, and social risks. 

(Image: Adobe Firefly)



Written by Aparna J