Parenting

I personally chose this topic, as it instantly caught my attention. I felt it’s something that everyone can relate to. All of us would have at least experienced parenting or being parented to. This is a vast topic to discuss about as parenting can be of various age groups and filled with scenarios of life.  Myself being 18 believe that I am way matured than any other student of my age should ever be. Hence, I am positive that I have the capability to talk a bit about Parenting. 

Firstly, I feel parenting should be about comfort. I am not questioning your mode of expressing love. When I say comfort, I mean a child should be able to come up to you asking for advices. If your kid doesn’t hesitate to do so you have done a great job! If not, try to start having interactions with your child with an open mind, even if you don’t fully agree or even quite comprehend what they’re talking about. Emotion is your enemy when you’re trying to get through to your teen. The moment you start getting furious, they give up on justifying their actions to you.  Remind yourself that what they say is not a reflection on you. It’s you and them against the world. My best advice to all the parents out there is to start LISTENING and not just hearing them out. Let me point out the difference for you. Hearing is the ability to use the ears only. In contrary, listening is a skill that requires one to use senses, analyzing on what scale the situation is being handled. If your child takes you as a liability, that’s where you will be drawing a line. You out of all the people in the world, should know your role which includes setting boundaries and letting them know there will be consequences if they are crossed. If your child is asking for more independence, it’s important to realize this is normal. Kids would really want more freedom. They wish to do more stuff with friends as they get older rather than isolating themselves at home. Giving your child enough freedom gives them an idea on how the world works and differentiate between right and wrong. Just because they are living under your roof, does not mean you get to establish your rights on them. Give them the privacy they deserve. But, don’t let your child bully you into giving them more freedom. If your child is pushing to get you to agree on something, you don’t have to respond in the right away. Make sure to link their freedom with responsibilities.

As a parent, it’s tough to stand by and see your children feeling like they don’t “measure up” or cannot handle things as well as their competitors seem to be able to. Teen’s self-esteem is constantly being challenged because they are regularly faced with new things to experience, new opportunities and new tasks to deal with. Their mental health will take a massive toss between self- hatred and guilt. Their soul craves for a helping hand. These are the times when parents need to open up their arms. Through this the bond also gets stronger. It’s a win-win situation. Even as a nuclear family, the married couple are the pillars of the house. Quarrels, miscommunication, disagreements are like the combination of pickle and curd rice. If you want the after taste to be good these factors must walk beside a marriage. But they need to be solved with a muffled voice. There has to be a limit for negative energy in a functioning place. If that exceeds at your home, your kids will be on a rollercoaster ride of emotions. Good parenting is when your kids don’t realize that you are living in an unhappy marriage. It is the parent’s responsibility to create a happy space for their children. It is an essential step of the parenting journey, which helps the kids to learn and grow. Young kids learn a lot about how to act by watching their parents. The younger they are, the more influenced they get by you. Before you lash out in front of your child, think about- Is that how you would want your child to behave when angry? Be aware that you're constantly being watched by your kids. Thus, try to show the best and polished version of yourselves.  I am not asking you to fake it but give your best to be a good role model to them. Try to nurture and encourage even when disciplining your kids. Make sure they know that although you want and expect better next time, your love and trust is safely intact. 

Parenting during midlife crisis is quite of a situation to be dealt with. Midlife crisis doesn't involve a shiny red sports car. bubbles underneath the surface, invisible, but no less real. Some women are like volcanoes - they erupt to release pressure. Others struggle in silence, boil with restlessness and anxiety, swallow it down, swiped on lipstick and call it a day. Kudos to those strong minds. Anatole France, a poet once said "All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another." Mid-life crisis inflicts so much damage on everyone in its path. They aren’t rational in this state. It’s very much like narcissistic personality disorder at times. When it comes to fatherhood at mid-life crisis they are also equally depressed. the only thing we as their children can try to do is sit down with him when he’s in a good mood. Explain to him the way you feel about the way he’s been acting lately and go from there. If that doesn’t work, then just try to stay out of his way for right now, give him time to figure things out. The mid-life crisis is often used as joke. Particularly when men are involved. It used to be considered to be a uniquely male thing, but in the past decades it’s become more inclusive. 

No parent can wish anything bad for their little ones. That’s the basic rule of nature. Nothing, I repeat, Nothing, you do can define you as a bad parent. At the bottom of our hearts, we do understand your intentions. Every child looks up to their parent at one point of time, either directly or indirectly. A child’s well-being can be influenced by many factors, but the parent-child relationship is undoubtedly the most significant aspect governing it.